Poopy Floor

Brenda’s urine hits the wee-wee pad most of the time, but her poop rarely does. In fact, when she does poop on the pad I’m actually shocked. Last night, for example, while my friend Kathryn was visiting, I set Brenda up in the kitchen with a plastic baby gate separating her from us. She had food, water, a bed, a bone and a wee-wee pad. Five minutes into her sequester I leaned over the gate and to my surprise she had peed and pooped right in the middle of the pad. It was a sight to behold, though unfortunately not too common.

Most of my mornings are spent stumbling out of bed, walking into the hall (at least she contains her poopy piles to the hall 90 percent of the time) and tip-toeing around multiple piles of shit. It has become an eight ball of sorts. The harder the piles, the better the day is going to be.